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Sunday, December 28

I've moved! :)

www.godlovesheli.wordpress.com

Heli Dont ask me why 5:28 PM

Monday, December 22

My QT for the day before my party
Psalm 145:1-7
I exalt You, my God the King, and praise your name forever and ever.
I will praise You every day; I will honour Your name forever and ever.
The Lord is great and is highly praised; His greatness is unsearchable.
One generation will declare Your works to the next and will proclaim Your mighty acts.
I will speak of Your glorious splendor and Your wonderful works, and i will declare Your greatness. They will give a testimony of Your great goodness and will joyfully sing of your righteousness.

I will do just that tomorrow. :)

Heli Dont ask me why 12:37 AM

Friday, December 19

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God. May Your gracious Spirit lead me on level ground." - Psalm 143:10

Sometimes i really wonder why my life is so drama-like, and just at times unthinkable. Things that took place and is taking place in the family, often take place in shows only. Yet, i guess when i say i thank God for all that happened, i can say it honestly and it is not a tys answer, but i really thank God that all these took place to make me grow and see things in His ways.

Dealing with a 5 digit sum of money, no, not dealing, but giving it up is really very hard for a worldly person. Addy reminded me the other day that, to us it is a big figure, yet in the eyes of God, He can give far better things. Not very convenient to completely illustrate what I'm facing now, i can only say that i really just want to do and make the right and wise decision that will please God, and that i truly meant it.

Teach me to do Your will Lord. And grant me the gracious Spirit to do so.

I will only say yes to Him, because He is my God, He is my Lord.

Heli Dont ask me why 11:21 AM

Sunday, November 23

Maybe i am a special need kid
When i was young, i had feelings for non-living things like my bolsters, pillows and blankets. At night, i made sure "they" are not at one corner, but that i would try to touch all of "them" so that "they" would not "feel" left out.

When i feel sad, and maybe experiencing some withdrawal symptoms (ha), i would put them altogether at one side, and i sleep at one corner without touching anyone of them.

I often wonder why is this heart of mine as such.

Now, I have to say goodbye to a car that is going to be scraped soon. Funny how sad i can be to saying goodbye to a car. I know it is very absurd to feel or even think this way, but i just cannot help it. Perhaps it is almost the same as saying goodbye to someone who is alive. Makes me want to "talk" to the car and thank it for so many things. I am weird.

I will miss you eight six seven four.

Heli Dont ask me why 5:21 PM

Wednesday, October 29

Stress.

I cannot deny it already. I'm feeling the stress coming in.

I'm really really stressed.

Not doing that well for cartography assignments is worrying especially when you stare around the class and think that everyone is a genius and is so gonna do well for the paper.

Not doing well for math term paper is worrying especially when you are taking the second time although you do not know how well people did for it because this is the second time and you should be having a edge higher than everybody.

Not able to start revising soon because assignments and projects are not finished and will never be finished until the deadline is here which leaves less than or approximately 3 weeks to study for papers. On top of that, papers are just back to back.

These are giants. Giants that i faced in school. I must be crazy and am a big fat (maybe skinny) liar if i claimed to say that i am not stressed. I don't think God says that we should be not real to our feelings. I think one will feel stressed and then try to deal with problems in the way He wants us to and learn from it. Once again, it is time to be David.

I wonder how many times i have to learn continuously in my life with regards to such things. Maybe forever for my entire life - we are gems to be polished and perfect till the day we go back. I am not saying all these and contradicting myself. I am really stressed and i am just gonna blog it all out and be real to what i feel. But it should not stop there. I'm gonna win with God.

"The Lord is my helper. I will not be afraid." - Hebrews 13:6.

Pray for me please.

Heli Dont ask me why 7:44 PM

Monday, October 13

Thank You God.

Its been a loooonggg time since i had that feeling. The feeling like you are in a garden where what surrounds you is just flowers, pretty ones and some falling down. And your heart is so full of that something like its going to explode - filled with joy. Joy from somebody who loves you so much and He just gave you something that you wanted badly. Just like a little girl that finally got her favourite candy. Your face couldn't hide away all that and you are just smiling all the way. you felt like you just want to see someone familiar and give him or her a hug. Woww.. it was really like on cloud nine or ten...

i passed my driving. =)

18 demerit points. naggy tester. raining. did not drive for past 2 weeks before test. It was all from and by the grace and mercy of God and His favour. If not for all these, if not for Him, i would not have passed. I would not have been able to feel like what i wrote above. Only You, have the power and ability and the heart to do that for me. I am so in awed of You for what You have done for me. Although it is just a test, but it has much more meanings attached to it for me. I will remember and i felt like i know you a little more. I love you God. Praise and honour unto You! =D

My QT this morning:
Prayer is something we need. God may not need to be told even as it is written in Matt 6:8, but we need to tell Him. It is not to influence Him to give us what we need. But prayer is designed to influence us. Prayer may not need to be about begging for blessings, but is a blessing itself.

my prayer now is that, "may i praise You and smile and love You still when i'm going through the hard times. Praise you Jesus."

Thank you for being my King who loves me.

Heli Dont ask me why 5:39 PM

Sunday, September 14

Holy Holy Holy Lord God Almighty

You are holy, holy
are you Lord God Almighty
worthy is the lamb
worthy is the lamb
You are holy

I remember this was the first song that i engaged with the Lord. I was at the FOP 2004, a pre-believer back then. I couldn't understand why people raise their hands up and sing these songs. But at that very moment in time when Hillsong sang this song, i just felt like wanting to raise my and hand up, and i felt very touched when i sang this song.

You are holy God, good God.

Heli Dont ask me why 10:48 PM

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